“What’s the frequency, Kenneth?” is your Benzedrine, uh-huh I was brain-dead, locked out, numb, not up to speed I thought I’d pegged you an idiot’s dream Tunnel vision from the outsider’s screen I never understood the frequency, uh-huh You wore our expectations like an armored suit, uh-huh¹ Part Lies, Part Heart, Part Truth, Part Garbage […]
Failure: the struggle is real.
So, yeah. Workouts. I knew I should have waited longer to write about them. I knew that as soon as I said something about my working out and put it out there for the world to see, the irrational part of my psyche feared that I’d jinx everything and it would all start to blow […]
The perfect storm.
Last year was, in many ways, a transformational year for me. It was the first year after more than two decades of active parenting where there were no more kids in the house to tend to and care for. It was the year TheCop and I really had to examine where we were, and decide where to go […]
Ziggy played guitar.
I don’t know where I’m going from here, but I promise it won’t be boring. —David Bowie Confession: I’ve always had a secret crush on David Bowie. At any age, really. You could say I grew up to a Bowie soundtrack, as his music oddly led a parallel existence to my life. His glam rock was more accessible to me […]
Seeking closure.
Sunday evening found me sitting in the Detroit airport awaiting my fourth flight of the day to get me back to my starting point over 14 hours earlier. I’d flown to Omaha, Nebraska, from a conference in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, via Chicago, Illinois, for a seven hour layover to attend a memorial service for my father. […]
Turbulence ahead.
We interrupt your conference fun for familial duty. We anticipate some rough turbulence ahead, but we’ll try to get you through it with minimum scarring. Hang in there and we’ll return you to your regularly scheduled programming as soon as humanly possible. Meanwhile, breathe deeply and think calm thoughts. Alcohol might also help.
Still life.
Despite nearing late September, the sun is bright in the sky. As is my norm on most summer weekends, I’m out on the deck reveling in the afternoon’s warmth, LoveJunkie sprawled at my side, recharging her own solar energy in the sunlight. Yesterday I spent the day in Harrisburg, not because I was having fun but […]
The hot mess.
It’s the first time in over a week that I’ve ventured out into a world with people. I’ve been avoiding the world in general, mostly because I can’t handle the prospect of witty repartee or sympathetic questions. Email. Texts. Facebook messages. Phone calls. They require so much effort, and I don’t have the wherewithal for […]
The importance of pruning.
I’m not, under any circumstances, a gardener. I’m comfortable knowing my talents lie elsewhere. But I do a good job of faking it; I listen to people who know how these things work, and I’ve picked up a list of tricks that have suited me well over the years. I’ve learned there are two types […]
Fathers and daughters.
Today my father passed away. It’s been at least a decade since we’ve spoken. I’m pretty sure he had long ago forgotten why; I’m uncertain if he ever regretted it. I only know we took our respective stances and wrote each other off. My father was a firm believer that children should be seen and […]
Lost connections.
Sometimes the bottom just falls out from under you. Sometimes you know it’s coming; you expect the call at any point. My dad has been in and out of the ICU for the last several weeks, and I wait for the call that it’s the last time — and yet he hangs on. But sometimes […]
